Unexpected trip to singapore

i am SUPER TIRED! Just got back from singapore with ze bf. It was unplanned. Ze bf called this morning and ask me to get ready coz we're going to singapore. I was still in mamai state and i straight away took my shower (it was freezing cold) and got ready. When i was in the car, i was still blur2 coz when ze bf said that he's going outstation tomorrow and his job to thai is going to be 1 day earlier then expected, all i can say is...hmm(in sleepy mode).

The trip was short coz we had to rush back but on the way back. We stumble upon a stranger and he needs a ride. I was giving that "petrified look" to the bf but knowing him, he gave in to the guy. I couldn't stop praying in the car and i wouldn't even rest my back to seat. All the scenes from the thriller movie were running through my head! Ze bf felt uneasy seeing me like that so we sent he to the next station that we can find. I FELT RELIEVED AT THAT MOMENT!

Before u start thinking, how selfish i am and so forth. Let me just tell you guys that this guy was planning to take a lift (all the way) to go to his destination. It was not because of his car broke down or what not.

Now i'm in my room and apparently his job was canceled for tomorrow so we can date again after he works =))

My colour theme

After looking at hundreds of photos and videos, i have made my mind on the colour for my room. I want it to be grey and blue. Well mom wanted purple+pink (which i think is soooo common) and green+yellow(i'm not digging colour) but i love the combination of grey and baby blue. It's so BEAUTIFUL. Some of you might say boring but SCREW you coz it's my room. Like what ID Rebecca Robeson says, LIVE YOUR STYLE. Ok let me show you my dream room

At the moment, i loving soft grey, baby blue and off white. I just realised  how much i hate purple, lilac, ivory and so on. It makes me puke (no offence to others who like this colour). No way my room is gonna look like that. I hate that colour! PERIOD! Maybe for my kids, i'll be ok but not for me!

Videos that made me cry thinking of you

This video remind me of us....

i dedicate this song to you

maysaa scarf has finally arrived!

 I've promised the bf that i'll post the pic of me wearing maysaa scarf. So here you are..

Excuse my oily face

Side way

Another style that you can wear it but i think i can't pull it off..pfft

Ze bf has just left for Qatar. He's just going to be there for 2 days and hopefully in the weekend we can date. insyaAllah..

toodles

See u on the weekend =(

ze bf is living to Qatar tonight. We were supposed to have lunch together tomorrow! Even when he told me that he's going for only 2 days, i still can't help myself from crying. It's just frustrating that everytime we plan for something, he needs to go somewhere else.

Like 2 weeks ago, we were supposed to go to the beach but in the end you went for the job in Batam. Whenever you say "B, i have a bad news" or "B, i need to tell you something", i feel like someone is kicking in the guts and i know at that point that you're going somewhere. i am still not used to being left over and over again and i don't know whether i'm going to be. That's life i guess..

i'm 23 today!

i got HEAPSSSSSSS of birthday wishes on my facebook wall today. i really mean HEAPSSS.

It was such a longggggg day and now i'm worn out. It all started with my class from 9am till 1pm and then continue with my capstone design meeting that last til 3.30pm. There was a long story behind the meeting but i'm too tired to spill it out. All i can say is i exploded and it felt GOOD. As soon as i got back, i was rushing doing the presentation for tomorrow but at 4.40pm ze bf called, saying that he's on his way. I got panicked coz i thought i have til 6pm before we meet up SOOooooo he waited for 1 damn hour and i felt bad all the way. If you ask me what do i think of being 23? my answer will be.......I CAN'T WAIT TO GET MARRIED BY THE END OF THIS YEAR...hahaha

To friends: Thank you for all the wishes and i appreciate each and everyone of you, it made my day =)

To family: Not even one of them remember my birthday, but i'm pretty immune to it. (daddy called and i thought he's going to sing for me but the first thing he said was "what colour do you want for your door?")

To ze bf: THANK YOU FOR ALL THE SURPRISES YOU GAVE ME TODAY. I LOVE THE FLOWERS, CARD AND THE PRESENT! Plus thank you for being so understanding bf. I love u so much and i can't wait to be your wife!

PD replied my email!!

OMG OMG OMG!!!!PD aka Vivy replied my email! if u don't know who she is then u must be living in a cave. SERIOUSLY. i read her blog EVERYTIME I GO ONLINE. ok..i sound like a loser here but that's the truth.

Anyway, i was thinking of sending an email to her a few days ago but i didn't have the guts to do so coz she's so famous and busy so why would she want to reply to my email yang x penting pun kan. but she did =)) ok now i sound like a 12 years old kid who is crazy on justin bieber. which one is better? loser or bieber??

the email was about toot's sister wedding. Her make up was flawless and i want to know who does the make up. i wanna post a pic of her but i guess i'll have to ask PD for permission..

stay tune..

bright and shine on monday morning

i've been working out constantly lately using exercise ball but without a yoga mat and now i've hurt my knee cap. Don't worry, it's nothing serious. Just a few bruises but still it hurts. First thing on the list for next month is yoga mat. (this month i've shopped too much so now sy sgt pokai!)

my favourite work out has got to be the planks. seriously it's awesome. that's why lah i makin lah perlu yoga mat.

off to shower

GET OUT OF MY FACE

i have not been myself this past couple of days. Sometimes i can be on top of the world and be as jolly as can be and sometimes i feel like my life is crushing upon me and i just want to run away. At the moment, i am more to the second part, running away. I can't take care of other people's feelings when i'm not in a good mood so that is why i prefer to be left alone at this time but it seems impossible to be alone. It feels like i have babies to take care of eventhough i am not married yet.

i don't hate anyone on particular. i just want to be alone. i don't want to get any text msgs or phone calls unless someone is dying. so i'll just find some place where i can find peace.

so for now, just leave me alone until further notice.

SARAWAK HAS BEEN ROBED!

i have read countless article on how our land was stripped/snatched/rob by YOU KNOW WHO..let us call him VOLDEMORT. I couldn't believe that i have been an ignorant sarawakian. This whole time, all we care is when is the new shopping complex going to be opened and when it is opened, we will then complain of the lack of retail shops in the market. i am begging you to wake up and read or if u're lazy then just take a look at the pictures.

voldemort share shock
RM 78 million from Sarawak’s Sewers – VOLDEMORT’S Shitload of profit!
Sarawak – Stolen At Gunpoint! (yours truly by VOLDEMORT!)
Corruption And Abuse of Power – Irrefutable Evidence Against VOLDEMORT. Exclusive!

Wake up my dear friends! We are the new generation of sarawak. Eventhough i am not dayak, org ulu, bisaya or etc...but i am sarawakian and i CARE about how the people are living in the pedalaman and how they have been MISTREATED. i am not asking you to be a warrior and kill or attack VOLDEMORT(Allah Maha Besar so don't have to worry about this), all i want is for all of you to be exposed and see the scene of sarawak rather than believing the superficial poster.

So to complete this post, below are the list of the suku kaum in sarawak. This might be incomplete so feel free to tell me.

 

Iban (Dayak Laut) 

• Sebuyau (Iban Sebuyau)
• Remun (Iban Remun)
• Balau (Iban Balau)
• Saribas (Iban Saribas)
• Iban Ulu Ai
• Iban Undup
• Iban Rajang

Bidayuh (Dayak Darat)

• Biatah - Padawan
• Bukar/Sadong - Serian
• Jagoi/Singai - Bau
• Selakau/Lara - Lundu

Melayu Sarawak

• Brunei Melayu Brunei)
• Dayak Muslim 
• Melayu Sumatera

Melanau

• Melanau Mukah
• Melanau Dalat 
• Melanau Oya 
• Melanau Matu-Daro-Rejang
• Melanau Ba'ie (Bintulu)
• Melanau Balingian
• Melanau Miri
• Melanau Igan 

Orang Ulu:-

• Kayan
• Kenyah
• Kajang
• Kejaman
• Punan
• Ukit
• Penan
• Lun Bawang
• Lun Dayeh
• Murut
• Berawan
• Kelabit

• Bisaya
• Kedayan
• (Bajau Kubang) banyak Terdapat d Semporna

 

The things that we took for granted

There were only 15 minutes left before Salat-ul Isha.

He quickly made Wudhu and performed Salat-ul Maghrib.

While making Tasbih, he again remembered his grandmother and was embarrassed by how he had prayed.

His grandmother prayed with such tranquillity and peace.

He began making Dua and went down to make Sajdah and stayed like that for a while.

He had been at work all day and was tired, so tired.

He awoke abruptly to the sound of noise and shouting.

He was sweating profusely.

He looked around.

It was very crowded.

Every direction he looked in was filled with people.

Some stood frozen looking around, some were running left and right and some were on their knees with their heads in their hands just waiting.

Pure fear and apprehension filled him as he realized where he was.

His heart was about to burst.

It was the Day of Judgment.

When he was alive, he had heard many things about the questioning on the

Day of Judgment, but that seemed so long ago..

Could this be something his mind made up?

No, the wait and the fear were so great that he could not have imagined this.

The interrogation was still going on.

He began moving frantically from people to people to ask if his name had been called.

No one could answer him.

All of a sudden his name was called and the crowd split into two and made a passageway for him.

Two angels grabbed his arms and led him forward.

He walked with unknowing eyes through the crowd.

The angels brought him to the centre and left him there.

His head was bent down and his whole life was passing in front of his eyes like a movie.

He opened his eyes but saw only another world.

The people were all helping others.

He saw his father running from one lecture to the other, spending his wealth in the way of Islam.

His mother invited guests to their house and one table was being set while the other was being cleared.

He pleaded his case,

'I too was always on this path..

I helped others.

I spread the word of Allah.

I performed my Salah.

I fasted in the month of Ramadhan.

Whatever Allah ordered us to do, I did.

Whatever he ordered us not to do, I did not.'

He began to cry and think about how much he loved Allah.

He knew that whatever he had done in life would be less than what Allah deserved and his only protector was Allah He was sweating like never before and was shaking all over.

His eyes were fixed on the scale, waiting for the final decision.

At last, the decision was made.

The two angels with sheets of paper in their hands, turned to the crowd.

His legs felt like they were going to collapse.

He closed his eyes as they began

To read the names of those people who were to enter Jahannam.

His name was read first.

He fell on his knees and yelled that this couldn't be,

'How could I go to Jahannam?

I served others all my life,

I spread the word of Allah to others'.

His eyes had become blurry and he was shaking with sweat.

The two angels took him by the arms.

As his feet dragged, they went through the crowd and advanced toward the blazing flames of Jahannam.

He was yelling and wondered if there was any person who was going to help him.

He was yelling of all the good deeds he had done, how he had helped his father, his fasts, prayers, the Noble Qur'an that he read, he was asking if none of them would help him.

The Jahannam angels continued to drag him.

They had gotten closer to the Hellfire.

He looked back and these were his last pleas.

Had not Rasulullah [SAW] said,

'How clean would a person be who bathes in a river five times a day, so too does the Salah performed five times cleanse someone of their sins'?

He began yelling,

'My prayers? My prayers? My prayers.?'

The two angels did not stop, and they came to the edge of the abyss of Jahannam.

The flames of the fire were burning his face.

He looked back one last time, but his eyes were dry of hope and he had nothing left in him.

One of the angels pushed him in.

He found himself in the air and falling towards the flames.

He had just fallen five or six feet when a hand grabbed him by the arm and pulled him back.

He lifted his head and saw an old man with a long white beard.

He wiped some dust off himself and asked him,

'Who are you?'

The old man replied,

'I am your prayers'.

'Why are you so late! I was almost in the Fire!

You rescued me at the last minute before I fell in'.

The old man smiled and shook his head,

'You always performed me at the last minute, did you forget?'

At that instant, he blinked and lifted his head from Sajdah.

He was in a sweat.

He listened to the voices coming from outside.

He heard the Adhan for Salat-ul Isha.

He got up quickly and went to perform Wudhu.

Pass this on to your friends and family.... ...

Maybe, you can help someone open their eyes.

And who knows?

Maybe, this is a good deed that can help you during the day of judgement.

(INSHA-ALLAH)

i'm loving it

i had a weird dream last night. I couldn't remember the details but all i know is i was traumatised by a crazy dude that i ditch before. It is super scary and i thought it was real!

Anyhoosss...i wore a leopard tube today to class(with cardigan of coz..i pakai tudung so of coz lah..) and i was brave enough to endure all the stares that people gave me. FYI i'm an engineering student and what we normally wear is something that you would wear to zzzZZZzzzz so when one person shows up in a leopard tube, you can imagine the scenes in legally blonde movie.

Yesterday i had lunch with ze bf at his office and after that i went to sunway pyramid by myself and it felt GREAT. i have always always always wanted to go shopping on my own and yesterday i did it. It is definitely not going to be the last time because it was fun (as long as u have $$$ to spend). It was the perfect timing for me to unwind my head and put my FYP for a rest.

ze bf just told me that he's not going to be working tomorrow and we're going for a date. Uber excited on wearing my new purchases.

Alhamdulillah, it all ended well. Now i can rest my case and be jolly happy me! i've splurged myself on maysaa hijab today. I've been thinking of buying it since the day of the fashion show and today i finally bought it =)

i'm actually waiting for the zuhur prayer so that i can sleep after that..i am SO TIRED and tonight i have class till 11pm!

toodles everyone

my aim is to move forward

This is just too sad. I tried hard to ignore and keep it inside and just lock it so that no one knows but i can't because it has always been my principle to be honest and truthful. Despite of the risk of losing you everytime i open my mouth but i guess that is the extra baggage you need to take with if you're willing to be with me.

One thing for sure is i have always love u this whole time.

i guess i'm sober now...

i'm scared and i'm not gonna lie. Mix feelings and feeling anxious the whole day. I think this is the right thing to do. i've been hiding for quite some time but now i'm ready to come out from my shell..

The night before the date.....

Lunch with ze bf tomorrow =) can't wait!! i'm actually searching for ideas on what to wear tomorrow and i found several awesome blogs. If you're covered and still want to be fashionable, go and check out this sites. It's gonna be awesome! Trust me =)

MuslimStreetFashion
hijabrevival
modestytheory

Now i am so in love with zara!! No kidding! How i wish it would be less expensive =( Oh btw i am so in love with this indonesian designer Irna la Perle. Seriously the designs are sooooOOOOooooo ME! I wish to wear this on my wedding day!

It's flowy yet very structured. This dress really defines who i am =)

I love the colour and for the fact that it's not body hugging!

What do u think b?

okay2...ada juak i nyelit on wedding stuff. bah2..i'm done for now..

toodles~~

good morning everyone!

i just finished zumba and i feel good =) Perhaps a new routine since i don't sweat as much as before. I'm thinking of hitting the gym or jog for a change, maybe later in the afternoon or tomorrow morning. MAYBE...

off to shower and go to dr. Hussain's class.

uber hyped!

Happy New Year everyone!

currently listening to kings of anything by sara bareilles and miss ze bf like heaps. speaking of which, i should sign in ym. sorry b..

Alhamdullilah, i haven't skipped any of my classes so far despite of i only have 1 or 2 hours of class a day. I've been spending a lot of money on my essentials and healthy food..argh..why am i so expensive! i don't know whether i'm gonna afford it when i work later on. Anywhoosss....ze bf is in singapore for work and i'm gonna spend another weekend without him..boohoo! I miss dating like HEAPS!


I've been updating my life with ira and cheryl although we're far apart. It's nice to know that i am surrounded with love no matter where i am =)

Happy New Year to everyone and i wanna write my resolutions here so next yr on 31st december 2010, i'll be checking whether i've crossed all of them or not.

1. First is to be a practicing muslim.
2. Get a degree with the result that  i want. InsyaAllah!
3. Get a job and experience all the wonderful thing of civil engineering world.
4. Starting to give some dough to my parents! (i am excited about this)
5. Next on the list is be married to Mr. Saifuliwan Ezzedin.
6. So of course, i hope i can carry all the duty as a wife to ze husband.

I guess that's enough for this year...i'll come back again and we'll see how many i would cross from this list. I hope everything will be crossed. InsyaAllah...

Please think twice before using airasia

Tired and jet lagged is the perfect word to explain what i'm feeling right now. I had enough with airasia and i swear i would never use their service ever again. I rather not go home than having to use airasia. PERIOD! Thank god MAS has the cheap plan and the price is cheaper than airasia most of the times.

How can I not be so fucked off since my flight was supposed to be at 7.50pm and they retimed it to 12.05am?! Although they have informed me through my cell at noon, i am still tipped by it. When i got to the airport, i can see all the tired kids and elder people waiting at the gate and it made me even mad. C'mon airasia, it's 2011 already! This news is kinda lame and so last century don't you think!

During the flight, i was so annoyed at one of the flight attendant! It's 2.30am and everyone is very cranky at the time, do you really have to flirt with the passenger nok dah tua and sik sedar dirik plus super FUGLY. i feel like banging their head all together at my front seat. !@@@@#$$#$##

Thank you airasia for giving me yet another horrendous memorable experience with you.